Breastfeeding On Planet Earth: Everywhere We Go

Nurse-Ins Across America

Velcromom — Mon, 19 Feb 2007 10:58:00 GMT

Lactivists unite at demonstrations wherever injustice has been done, getting the word out to the public that breastfeeding is eating, and our babies have as much right to eat when and where they need to as anyone else. Check out this video of moms and babies and be inspired to join the cause!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kmgLgIUB2T4

Right On Cue – How Nursing In Public Supports Successful Breastfeeding

Velcromom — Thu, 08 Feb 2007 14:10:10 GMT

Let’s talk about why women need to NIP - the physiological reasons that make NIP the healthiest choice for both ourselves and our baby, and not just a lifestyle choice.

Obviously, when the baby is hungry they must be fed, but there’s more to it than that.

Nursing on cue is a critical part of maintaining a successful breastfeeding relationship. Evidence shows that when the breast is most full, production of milk is at its slowest. If you repeatedly allow your breasts to fill by delaying a nursing session, which is what happens whenever you give a bottle instead of nursing, then you are signaling your body to make less milk. To best support a healthy supply that meets the needs of your growing baby, don’t delay feedings – your baby and your body will simultaneously cue you as to when it is time to nurse. Respond to those cues and your body will too.

Engorgement is one result of giving a bottle instead of letting the baby nurse. Your body knows that it was time to feed the baby, and fills your breasts with milk – but no baby latches on. Until the next time you nurse the baby, you may be stuck with a pair of sore, too-full breasts. Shopping or doing other errands is miserable with engorged breasts. But the pain is not your worst problem with engorgement.

Plugged ducts happen when the milk is not emptied efficiently from the breast. In the case of skipping a feeding to give a bottle or solids, the milk has not been emptied at all and a plugged duct is more likely to happen. La Leche League lists missed feedings as one cause of mastitis. Sure you can treat a plugged duct, and you must, in order to prevent its uglier big sister, mastitis, from setting in. But whatever you avoided by not nursing in public can quickly start to seem much less intimidating when compared to the pain of plugged ducts or especially mastitis.

It’s clear that in order to nurse on cue, we must be prepared to nurse wherever and whenever we need to. Both our baby and our own bodies give us clear signals about when it is time to nurse. By responding promptly to these signals no matter where we are, we are able to maintain a healthy supply, avoid the pain of engorgement, plugged ducts and mastitis, and of course meet our growing child’s need for frequent nourishment and comfort. Breastfeeding in public isn’t a lifestyle choice that can simply be rejected without consequences – it is a need that must be met to maintain optimal health on the part of both mother and child.

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Whose Responsibility Is It?

Velcromom — Thu, 08 Feb 2007 14:15:01 GMT

The idea that breastfeeding in public is impolite; especially with the added “unless it is discreet,” tells us a few things about the person harboring this belief. One, they've informed us that they have absorbed this culture’s over-sexualization of the breast. Many people will deny this - but if the breast weren’t primarily sexual in a person’s mind, they would not feel discomfort at the sight of a breastfeeding baby. Two, they have told us that they feel it is your responsibility to make them more comfortable. They have asked that you change your behavior to accommodate their personal beliefs about breasts.

The first, you cannot do much about. Changing a person’s beliefs about the sexuality of the female breast, as paradoxical as those beliefs may often be in this culture, is just not going to happen in one encounter. The second – now there is something you can work with.


 
 
 
Nursing Among Friends
You are in a position to make an empowered choice. Depending on the circumstances of the moment, you may feel obligated to defer to the needs of the other party to be comfortable. You may know or be related to the person. Often, there is an initial period of discomfort for the friend or family member, and that might make you think you should change what you are doing.
 
 The common belief that breastfeeding without hiding is impolite can cause confusion about who is responsible for the comfort of whom. Consider a story I often hear from other moms – they tell me that the initial sight of the baby nursing made their friends or family feel that perhaps they should leave, or offer a cover-up – not because they were offended, but surprisingly, because they were unsure of the confidence level of the mother herself, and were seeking to find out where her comfort zone was. They were not comfortable themselves until they were shown or told, that the mother was simply carrying out an everyday parenting task  - normal behavior and conversation could continue. So you may choose to demonstrate to and tell your friends or family that you are just feeding the baby. Carry on the conversation and look them in they eyes, just be completely normal as you would if you were simply holding the baby. Most often, this will reassure the other party that you are comfortable, and they in turn will relax too.
 
I hear quite often from mothers that in beginning with their first child, in-laws and friends might walk away or offer blankets when they see she is nursing the baby. Once they realize that simply feeding the baby does not shame the mother, they stop the avoidance behavior and by the time the second child comes along, they can sit and chat with the mom as she breastfeeds the baby and no one thinks a thing of it.
 
 
In an experience with my in-laws, my own assumptions and misplaced feelings of responsibility were revealed. During the time my second son was nursing I usually sat somewhat apart from the family to breastfeed when my father-in-law was present. I assumed he was not comfortable with my nursing his grandchild after the age of six months, when his own children were weaned to a bottle. A few years later, after he had passed away, I discovered during a conversation with my husband that my father-in-law had thought our nursing through toddlerhood made very good sense and he didn’t have a problem with it. I’d separated myself and my son from hours worth of family interaction because of an incorrect assumption and my mistaken feeling of responsibility for someone who was already taking perfectly good care of their own comfort.





Nursing Among Strangers
Here too, it is your choice to decide whose needs to be responsible for. Remember that there is nothing inherently rude or impolite about simply feeding your child. There is nothing inherently rude or impolite about breasts. The thoughts of others are what make them feel discomfort with breastfeeding. You cannot control their thoughts, but you can control your own actions.
 
Again, the environment and circumstances offer you information to make your decision. You likely won’t think in detail about it, you’ll simply look around and see if you feel you are in a good place to nurse. You may be dealing with a colicky baby that week, you may find yourself sitting across from your partner's boss at the company picnic, you may be fifteen minute’s walk away from your car, or you may have any other number of factors that influence your choices at that moment. Keep in mind, that when you become invisible to breastfeed, you are implicitly agreeing with the cultural belief that breastfeeding should be hidden.
 
 This is not to say that there aren’t times a mother needs a quiet place to nurse, we have all been there! It is only to say, be aware of complying with beliefs you don’t agree with, and when it is possible for you and your nursling, go about your business with an aura of normalcy and confidence, without hiding. 
 
There is no need to take responsibility for the personal comfort of those who disapprove – you’re already being polite, you are already fulfilling your responsibilities to society and to your child as well as yourself – it is unreasonable of anyone to ask you to bear their responsibilities as well.
 
 Of course in the beginning, you might not feel as confident as all that, but nobody out there needs to know you have butterflies in your stomach. Start out slow in easy situations, bring a supportive friend, practice acting confident till you feel confident, (remember, the Mona Lisa smile) and soon you will feel a sense of satisfaction. Satisfaction that you have taken the best course of action for your baby, that your behavior accurately reflects your values, and to top it all off, that you are able to provide a much-needed positive role model for our culture.

The Consequences Of Breastfeeding In Public

Velcromom — Thu, 08 Feb 2007 14:41:31 GMT

After reading some of the bewildering and/or vile comments against the MSNBC article and my site, I’m wondering what exactly is it that these individuals fear would happen if women simply went about their business and breastfed their babies whenever and wherever they needed to. What is the horrible dire thing that would happen? Well, those who don’t want to see breastfeeding in public are happy to tell you! Here are some of those dire events they think up - I will use the exact phrases and words they did – I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried, some of it is so odd. I won't go into picking apart their spectacularly failed logic, it is self-evident. But I am feeling snarky enough to add my initial reactions in italics.

“Extracting bodily fluids” in public might become the norm. People will feel free to just pull down their pants and urinate wherever they want.

They will also feel free to engage in public spitting, and um, sweating. (huh?)

Innocent children would have breasts blasted in their face. (oh my! Do any of your breasts blast?? Mine never have, and I’m wondering just exactly what that is)

Society will become even less civilized. (I guess realizing that breasts aren’t just for sex will piss off a lot of people and cause rampant grumpiness?)

At any rate, this increase in uncivilized behavior will cause life to be a lot less pleasant during the “end time” and “last days” here on earth.

If breastfeeding in public becomes the norm, people will feel free to fart in elevators. (they don't already? lol)

Everyone will see how motherhood destroys a woman’s body. (???)

Mothers are hastening the demise of humanity through overpopulation. (ok, what that has to do with breastfeeding I don’t know but someone thought it made their argument against NIP stronger somehow…)

Women will become more promiscuous, since breastfeeding in public is equivalent to having sex with anyone and everyone. (that one told me a bit too much about what goes on in that reader’s mind, eek)

I think that’s enough, don’t you? It’s funny at first but a sad commentary on society as a whole. Fortunately, the negative comments, as ugly as they are, comprise only a small percentage of the messages that come through www.nurseherenow.com. We’ve focused on them with tongue in cheek, but the truth is - and pay attention here, moms – very few people feel that negatively about nursing in public. Most who are not supportive of nursing in public feel a vague sense of discomfort and then take responsibility for their own needs and look away. The odd few who have extreme or strange thoughts like those listed above, are irrelevant to our decision making process when it comes to choosing where and when to feed our children.

So back to my original question – what are the consequences of breastfeeding in public? What would happen if we all breastfeed our babies where and when they need it? Here are a few things that can really happen.

As a mom, you will feel free to travel when and where you choose. You will enjoy the full, complete convenience of breastfeeding, when you realize you don’t have to endure the added hassles of pumping, bottles, artificial nipples, washing and sterilization of equipment.

You will feel much more comfortable as your baby enjoys his or her meal. Instead of feeling a letdown of milk from your painfully engorged breasts while your child drinks from a bottle, and wondering, “how long can I tolerate this miserable discomfort?” while calculating how long it will take to get home and crossing your fingers you don’t get a plugged duct or mastitis… you’ll enjoy the normal, convenient biological process of breastfeeding and go about your business in greater comfort, able to keep your mind on your tasks and your baby. It’s very freeing to realize you don’t have to risk your breast health, your milk supply or endure engorgement, just to please some random strangers.

When you nurse in public, you show other women that yes, it can be done and no, you don’t have to hide. In today’s society, we have lost the chain of knowledge that used to be passed down in close-knit extended families. We now have few wise crones to learn from, but instead are inclined to quietly watch and assess what other women are doing – everything from unimportant information such as, “are they wearing black or brown this season?” to critical knowledge like birth and breastfeeding – it is natural to turn to what we see happening in our culture to help guide us. If breastfeeding is invisible in our culture, as we have seen, it becomes a dying art and the very clear (but not-often spoken of) negative effects on our infant population’s health are a sad consequence.

Breastfeeding Images To be Displayed in Art Show

Velcromom — Fri, 02 Feb 2007 21:19:53 GMT

From the Newport News Times, we find a different kind of breastfeeding in public is taking place!

Juried show to feature the 'Art of Breastfeeding'

Pictures of babies and bottles are so common most people don't even give them a second glance.

Pictures of breastfeeding babies, however, are few and far between; and even the act itself can be the source of public outcry.

Pat Lewis of the Lincoln County Breastfeeding Coalition hopes to change this perception with a special juried show called "The Art of Breastfeeding."

MSNBC Article on Nursing In Public

Velcromom — Tue, 30 Jan 2007 18:54:00 GMT

Yesterday MSNBC featured an article by Debbie Cafazzo titled "Food or Lewd? Breastfeeding opens divide". The article included a quote from me, along with others, and a link to nurseherenow.com. Debbie and I had had a conversation a few weeks ago after she contacted me through the site asking to interview me for the upcoming article. I thought the article was fairly positive, at least it seemed to me that it presented the pro-NIP stance as sensible, while at the same time it did include a few quotes that represented the anti-NIP stance. I was happy to see the points made about our culture's over-sexualization of breasts and felt that except for the use of the word "lewd" which just creeps me out used in connection with children eating, the article presented good arguments for NIP. See what you think - do you think that articles like this help, or just capitalize on the current media fascination with breastfeeding?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/16773617/print/1/displaymode/1098/

on a side note, NurseHereNow.com is a bit swamped with comments due to the article and I'll have more to say about that soon! It may take me weeks to read them all!

Welcome - Please Read Before Posting

Velcromom — Sat, 03 Feb 2007 10:52:05 GMT

You've found the blog for Nurseherenow.com, if you are familiar with the site you are aware that it is a place of support and encouragement for nursing moms on the go. We are not here to convince opponents that breastfeeding in public is right. We are here to uphold the strength of those mothers who live and parent in a culture of disapproval, so that they are empowered to parent the way they need to without adopting inappropriate shame and embarrassment.

We are here to support women who would like to stop allowing others to influence them away from breastfeeding in public, and who wish to move towards a more empowered stance in which we as mothers realize that disapproval or fear of disapproval does not have to affect the decisions we make.

We are not here to debate about nursing in public nor will we host negative comments about breastfeeding or nursing in public. On the other hand, if you have a story to share, information to share, or just want to chime in and add your support, please do so.